Talks With Mama

6 Jan

It’s funny how the one person you sometimes try to avoid and dodge questions from always winds up being the ONE person you turn to and talk to when you find yourself wanting or needing to talk to someone.

Tonight when I came home, I had one thing on my mind that has been on my mind for weeks and I hadn’t quite spoken about it much. When I got home I tried hiding in my room for a bit and that was my goal. Stay in my room. But then I was hungry so that didn’t work.

My face kind of gave everything away and usually when I’m down or upset – it’s not hard to tell. I’m a VERY happy person and I smile through alot of things that are going on in my life. But this time was different. My emotions got the best of me and my Mom took notice.

All she had to do was ask me what was wrong and all of my emotions came flying out of me like the wind. Almost all at once. What we talked about was one thing and this one thing she’s familiar with – but she understood where I was coming from and just didn’t want to see me upset and keep getting upset over the same thing that just isn’t becoming worth it anymore. To no surprise, my Mother lifted up my spirits just like I knew she would. I didn’t have to sulk all night about what was on my mind and after talking it over with Mom, I feel a little better about things than I did a few hours ago.

My Mama usually manages to balance me – like a scale. Perhaps that’s why she’s a Libra. She brings balance to my life and helps me weigh things a little better and take a bigger look at things when I talk about them with her. Sometimes I do alot of the talking, but as much as people know me as one who is a talker, there are times when it’s just hard for me to begin a conversation when it’s about something that’s bothering or upsetting me. It doesn’t come easy for me. It never has. I know what I want to say – but I usually wind up saying the polar opposite of things. Am I the ONLY one this happens to?

I avoid confrontation at all costs. Which is why I’ve never been in a girlfight/fist fight/ any kind of fight. I might have been bullied in the past, but believe me when I tell you that even my junior high school bully turned out to be my best friend until this very day. She’s living proof and she’ll tell you herself except she won’t admit she bullied me – haha!

Where am I going with this?

Ah! Yes. Back to my Mama.

Her talks always bring me back to center in a way that I’m always thankful for. I really don’t know where I would be without our talks. Sometimes I bicker and argue with her, but in all honesty she’s so supportive of me and I look to her guidance all of the time. I don’t need any crazy life-altering experience to make me realize what I have because I realize it all of the time whenever we have our talks and I remember just why I turn to her for support and guidance in the first place. She’s my Mama and Mama knows best.

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